*~*~*
When Lily walked into the library that night, it became apparent that Barty's little stunt, teamed with her curiosity, had caused her a major setback in the area of James Potter. When she sat down, he glared up at her for a fraction of a second, then continued his search in the newspapers. When she attempted a conversation and an apology, he moved to a different table. When she followed, he scowled at her malevolently. "Can you not take a hint?"
"Can you not accept a sincere apology?"
"No."
"When you live in spite you hurt no one besides yourself. You know, I am trying to help you. But you continually slap away my offerings, and slam them in my face. I'm trying to be your friend, but you growl and look at me as if I'm here to hurt you. It's obvious that you have went through something in your life that I haven't, that most people haven't, and you're hurt from it. You can move past that hurt, or you can let it grow and fester like a nasty wound, and you can let it destroy you. Nobody can live for long the way you do, James. I hope you can find some sort of peace soon, because I've had it with you. I have a little pride to, and you know what, I don't like you, or Remus, or my Transfiguration grade enough for my pride to be continually shot down. So you can sit here and mope in the dark library with a bunch of nineteen year old newspapers for the rest of the year and I don't care." She paused and looked as if she had been hit by a rampaging manticore. "Oh my! Nineteen years? What are-"
"Get out of here! NOW!" James said furiously, knowing this witch was too clever for his own good.
"No way, not now. You are looking for-"
"Madame Pince?!!!" He shouted loudly,looking slightly panicked, making the library trot over. "She's disturbing my studying, would you please remove her?"
Lily's eyes widened, and she picked up her own books, her face red with anger and mortification, and stomped out. She was grinding her teeth as she walked briskly down the cool hallways, but had calmed down by the time she saw Remus waiting for her eagerly outside of the portrait to the Gryffindor common room. The hopeful look on his face made her feel a tiny bit bad for her outburst.
"Well?"
"He got me kicked out of the blessed library!"
"What?!"
"He GOT ME KICKED OUT OF THE LIBRARY! Do you know how humiliating that was? Besides, he's incredibly rude, and won't even accept a well-meant apology!" Lily pointed her finger into Remus's chest. "And through all of that, I found out what he's looking for."
"What?!"
"Don't be redundant. And technically, I don't know for sure, but I've got one heck of a guess. One that I think is right."
"What?!"
*~*~*
"Is he walking toward us?" Millie asked whoever happened to be listening to her at the moment, which would be either/and/perhaps neither of her friends as they walked down the corridor after .
"He probably wants to talk to me about Quidditch." Amos said, glancing to see the encroaching James Potter.
"Or not." Lily muttered, not liking the stormy look on his face.
"Hey! James! What's goin-"
"I can't believe you!" James hissed at Lily, interrupting his fellow Quidditch player. "I honestly thought you were better than that!"
"Told what?" Lily asked, hoping feigning innocence would get her off the hook.
No such luck.
"Don't play the fool." He took her arm and started leading her away. "And how in the hell did you even find out for that matter?"
"Lily?" Millie asked worriedly, following them.
"Go to class, Millie." James said sharply, not turning back to look at her, so he was surprised when she planted herself in front of him.
"Classes are over for sixth years today. Except Lily, she has an advanced class. Which she needs to be getting to." She took Lily's hand, and attempted to lead her away from James.
"We need to talk, and this is my only available time."
"Come on, Lily." Millie protectively put herself between Lily and James. "She's going to class. I'm sure whatever you want to say to her can be said in the common room tonight. With witnesses."
"Like hell it-"
"Millie, I'll be fine. I can get there in time. Don't worry. Let's go." Lily looked at James over Millie's shoulder.
"Are you-"
"I'm sure." Millie slowly left, and Lily turned to James. "Whatever you want to say, say it."
"It's not worth it. Forget about it." He muttered, his head hung, making his black hair fall over his face.
"It was the deal I made with Remus, and you now that. It wasn't anything personal, believe it or not, the world isn't out to get you." Lily said wryly, trying to toss in a little humor.
"Whatever." James turned on his heel, and walked away, and Lily being Lily, couldn't let the situation walk off with him. She chased after him, grabbing the sleeve of his robes to make him slow down for her. "I didn't know for sure, you know. It was merely a guess, but I suppose you just confirmed it."
"Are you going to tell anyone?"
"Of course. I'm going to hang a note on all the dormitory doors, and probably write it on the walls of the girls' toilets."
Silence.
"Of course I'm not going to tell anyone. It's not something I would necessarily want the whole world to know about me. Oh wait! The whole world DOES know it about you! Gee, how could I have been so daft?"
"You are awful mouthy for the resident golden girl."
"And you're awfully rude for the resident golden boy." Lily retorted sharply. "You know, this isn't a one-way street. If you want me to be honest with you, I expect nothing less from you."
"You act like we're friends." James's face twisted into an odd expression which Lily couldn't describe completely as curiosity or wariness.
"I'm trying to be your friend."
"I don't want anymore friends."
"Because you've carefully selected the ones you have and I don't quite make the grade?"
"Precisely. Now, could I have a simple yes or no as to whether you're going to blab to the entire school about what you think you know about me?"
"It isn't worth my time. I am not Bertha Jorkins, contrary to your belief, and I can find better ways to occupy myself."
"Is that a no?"
"Yes, it's a no!"
"Good. Very good." James looked highly satisfied as he smirked his way down the hallway, leaving Lily to fume in his wake.
*~*~*
"Millie!" Lily called tauntingly as she stepped in the dormitory, ready to provide the explanation she had put off until now. "I know what you guys wouldn't tell me?"
"And what of many things would that be?" Millie was lying on her bed, her Transfiguration book open in front of her, pretending she wasn't interested.
"The secret about James Potter."
"Oh?" Extreme disinterest. "I think I got tomorrow’s assignment figured out. You shouldn't have much trouble with it."
"So you don't want to hear what I found out?" Lily was beyond excited as she bounded onto her own bed.
"Why not?"
"It's about his family, isn't it?"
"What's this?"
"Oh, come off it, Millie! Nobody is here, it's just you and I! You can tell me what’s going on." She was alight with excitement, very much enjoying the moment. "What nobody will talk about, it's about his family, right?"
"Maybe." Millie answered cautiously, studying her parchment carefully. "Look, Lily, can we just drop this? I'm not comfortable with the topic at all."
Lily, sensing her friends discomfort, sat silent for a few moments. "Alright, you can tell me if you feel like I need to know. But would you just tell me why you, or anybody else for that matter, can't tell me?"
"I'm involved too closely in the situation, just like many others."
"Thank you." Lily brushed her hair into a fresh ponytail and watched Millie for awhile in the mirror. Seeing that her friend wasn't going to do anything else particularly interesting, she headed for the exit.
"What're you doing?"
"What do I do every evening?"
"UUUGGGHHH!" Millie hit her pillow, apparently in either anger or frustration, "Don't you get it?"
"I guess I don't. Bye."
"Bye." Millie grumbled, shooting her a parting look of caution, which Lily ignored.
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